With invitations in the mailbox and finalizing wedding details it is easy to get so caught up in the never ending to-do list. I have had the honor of working with many couples from all stages of their relationship (premarital to being married 30+ years). I have also been able to work with couples going through a divorce. Through these experiences I have one major piece of advice. As you are about to make this commitment (or for those who already have), remember the following:
You are making a two part vow.....
1) A vow to a changing person - this person will grow, will change and will not always be like the person you dated. There is even a possibility with aging and sickness this person may not remember you or be able to do all the things they once did for you.
2) A vow to an unchanging God - God's words about marriage in the Bible will not change. God's viewpoint on the promises made, the declaration to love and honor until death parts you both will not change. The viewpoint of hating divorce and what it does to a family will not change. Being a God that can be trusted will also not change. Being a God that can redeem any situation (even if you are standing on the other side of divorce) will not change.
It is important as you say your vows you realize it is a two part vow and what this entails.
Overall, when a couple enters a marriage and understands this two part vow it is amazing to watch. Not that problems do not come; they do, but that this couple's marriage is build on such a strong foundation that it is an amazing force that stands up against those problems!
“Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.” - Matthew 7: 24 - 27 NIV
Editor's Note: The Community Care ministry provides emotional and spiritual support. There is a pastor or community care leader available to speak with you today. If you have questions regarding the Community Care ministries please contact communitycare@mecklenburg.org or 704.598.9800 x 121. You may also learn more at the Community Care website and our upcoming events page.
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